A.S. Neill was a child advocate who needs to remain dead!
The fact that this quote is being extensively discussed on Facebook and the passive agreement of several of the moms responding is making me sick!
1920’s Parents
“A wise society would not ask anyone under 20 to do a stroke of work, for infancy lasts far into the teens. Childhood is playhood—we should face that fact. So, worried parents, sigh and reach for the dishcloth, and remember that your child’s standards are different from yours. To many an adolescent, an untidy room means nothing—he simply doesn’t see it.”— A.S. NEILL
Since I know nothing about this man, I figured I should look him up. According to Wikipedia Alexander Sutherland Neill (17 October 1883 – 23 September 1973) was a Scottish progressive educator, author and founder of Summerhill school, which remains open and continues to follow his educational philosophy to this day. He was highly influenced by Maria Montessori and he is best known as an advocate of personal freedom for children. I’m making a wild guess that he wrote this quote sometime during the 1920s.
Ok, so back in the early 1900’s and into the Industrial Revolution, children were given life so they could ease the work load of their parents. During the Industrial Revolution, children were working in the factories to help earn money for their families. Everyone worked. Children were beaten into blind obedience and given no opportunity to actually use their minds or speak to their elders. Back then, children needed Mr. Neill as an advocate. He was right. Children should not work a farm like an adult until they are 20. Children should not work in a sweat shop factory until they are 20. He was speaking to a different generation of parents.
Today’s Parents
But not today! To many 21st Century adults don’t even know how to do their own laundry, or cook, or clean! Some of the United States’ obesity epidemic is because we now have three generations of adults and children don’t know to cook! And they said we didn’t need Economics in school! Agh!
Moms! … We are raising adults … not children!
A mother’s responsibility is to lovingly teach her children to think for themselves and learn everything they will need to know to live productive lives as adults.
I was told a story about a young woman who joined a sorority in college and a bunch of the young women got sick one winter. All of the other girls had grown up in very privileged homes where they didn’t have do a thing. This young woman was the only one in the sorority who knew how to find and call a doctor!
Children are not meant to be parents’ slaves and parents are not meant to be theirs. A family works and plays together, not separately with mom doing all the chores while the teens play X-Box. Seventy years ago “play” was different. When this quote was written, the radio was was just coming into use. Televisions would come about in another 30 years. Computers video games, and the Internet would take half a century to arrive.
It’s no wonder today’s children feel entitled to everything. Too many parents have given it to them and expected nothing in return. This has to stop!
Should Children Work?
Children build their self-esteem and confidence when they work at and accomplish a task. It’s the process of working that builds self-esteem, not our praise. In the book, NurtureShock, there is an entire chapter devoted to this topic. When children are told how smart and amazing they are, they don’t want to mess up that label so they wouldn’t try the harder questions on a test. Children who were recognized for the hard work they put into a task, were much more willing to tackle harder problems on the test, and it actually made them happy!
Just like us as adults, children may hate their chores, but they feel immense pride when they’re finished. It feels good to have completed a job well done. Especially when they know that as soon as they finish, they get to go play. Yes, our children still play Mr. Neill and they aren’t forced to work in factories.
A. S. Neill, your job is done. May you Rest In Peace … and stay there!
What About You?
Do you agree with A.S. Neill or have a different opinion? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
